The holidays are the most wonderful time of the year. The crisp air is filled with joy & anticipation of the coming holiday. But there is a dark side of Xmas, a sad, disappointing side. Craptastic gifts.
The absolute worst part of the holidays is getting shitty presents. I don't mean cheap gifts, cause cheap gifts can be awesome, I'm talking about outright CRAPPY gifts. Gifts that say without words that the giver knows nothing about you and would rather just get you a generic nail clipper set from Wal-Mart than spend the time finding you something you would actually LIKE. When I was 12 my aunt Bobby got me a horrifying pink & black striped sweater that might have fit me back when I was 8. I got a Barbie doll from my grandma one year, and while it was a lovely doll, I didn't have much use for it at age 17. And I can tell my mom all year long what I want for Xmas, but come Xmas morning I will invariably receive $50 worth of shower gel & lotion. It is the BIGGEST disappointment. I'm all eagerly ripping open a gift with childlike joy, wondering what it could possibly be, only to find it's just lotion. And its not just my mom- her best friend gave me a bath set last year too! AAAARGH. It's getting harder & harder every year to pretend I like these horrible, thoughtless presents. The anticipation of more bath sets every year are turning me into a real Grinch. I may just try to steal Christmas this year if it will prevent my bathroom cabinet from having 10 more bottles of stuff crammed into it. I am still using up all the damn bath shit I got last year, I swear if I get even ONE bottle of bubble bath this year I'm gonna lose it. You will see me on top of a bell tower firing randomly. But hey, at least I'll SMELL GOOD! Yeesh.
The kicker is- most of the time, I have allergic reactions to this made-in-china crap. I'm scared to even use half the stuff I get cause I might break out with hives or itchy red rashes. Talk about adding insult to injury. Get me socks, get me underwear, get me a $5 gift card from a store I'll never shop at, get me an Emily Post etiquette book for Christ's sake- just get me ANYTHING but bath stuff, PLEASE.
People, put just a microsecond of thought into your gifts this year. Your recipients will love you for it.
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